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Let’s talk hair (#2 in the series!)

Ok.  Let’s talk hair.  I have been getting a lot of e-mails/comments about my hair lately.  You are all incredibly kind and the reason I haven’t cut my hair in so long.  Yes – I’m blaming the fact that I haven’t changed my hair in the past three years on my blog readers!  I used to mix things up and get a new hairstyle every year.  Lately whenever I decide I’m going to chop it all off and go for a new look I get a sweet e-mail or blog comment about my hair!  And it makes me decide to keep it like this a little longer.  So thanks for that.  I think.  ;)  Seriously though – I have the nicest readers and I really want to answer your questions.  So many of you have asked about how I style it, maintain it, what products I use and I just wanted to let you know that at some point I will do a post on my hair.  I actually did a “let’s talk hair” post a year ago, but it probably wasn’t that helpful in really showing you how I style it so the plan is to do a better/updated one in the near future.  I just need to figure out how!  I can’t take pictures of myself doing my hair (although attempting that would be good for a laugh!)  so I need to recruit a few friends to help and I need to find time during the day to make this happen.  Not an easy feat with my current schedule, but I’ll figure something out!  So if you have any specific “hair” questions you want answered, ask them in the comment section of this post and I’ll do my best to answer them.

I did want to take a minute to answer this question I received on last Friday’s post:

“I always read your blog comments too, and everyone always mentions your hair ALWAYS looking nice (they are right), it just dawned on me why your hair ALWAYS looks nice…you live in San Diego!!!  I have vacationed in California a few times and both times that I went to San Diego,  I noticed that all the women looked their best, even in Target.  That is Hollywood/Celeb territory and maybe that is why?  I would love to get your thoughts on this Erin, was it just my perception or do people that live in your area always put on their A game?

Well.  This is a great question and I am more than happy to share my thoughts on this!  Two parts to this question.  First I’ll tell you why I always have my hair done and try to look my best.  Then I’ll give you the scoop on San Diego!  (If you’re sticking around for this long winded post now might be a good time to grab a snack… :)

I’m a hair girl.  I care about my hair.  I always have regardless of the city I’m living in.  If I only have 10 minutes to get ready, I do my hair, not my make-up (then I stick on my sunglasses because it’s always sunny here and we wear them year round – best no make-up trick in the book!  Of course you’re in trouble when you step inside…)  My friend Darci and I always joke that we could talk “hair” for hours and we could!  Products, styles, what we do to tame our thick hair.  I enjoy doing my hair and I feel better about myself when it’s done.  When I had my first baby and quit teaching school to stay home with her I fell into a bit of a depression.  I was in a new city with no family around and all of my friends were working.  Ellie was a fussy baby and motherhood was hard and not at all what I pictured.  I stopped caring about what I looked like.  I was packing around baby weight so I wore sweats a lot.  Plus I was covered in baby spit up and who was going to see me anyway?  My big outing of the day was down the street to the grocery store and I didn’t think the produce man really cared.  I got stuck in a bad cycle.  The less I cared, the more depressed I became and the more depressed I became, the less I cared.  I remember walking past my bedroom mirror bouncing my fussy baby one morning.  I saw my reflection in the mirror and started to cry.  Who was that?  I decided in that moment that I was going to get my life back.  I was going to start exercising again.  Start doing my hair and make-up again even if I only had 10 minutes to spend on it.  Start wearing real clothes again – even if I had to buy a few things in bigger sizes until I lost the baby weight.  So I did.  I made myself a priority and I can’t tell you the difference it made.  Even if my only outing for the day was a trip to the grocery store, I held my head up and smiled at people.  If I ran into a neighbor I said hi and was friendly instead of ducking and heading down a different isle.  And most importantly, I was a happier mom.  I was a better person when I took care of myself.  So I learned an important lesson:  You have to take care of yourself for you, not for anybody else.  Do it because of the way it makes you feel.  I have made exercise a priority and taken at least 10 minutes each day to do my hair ever since!

By my third baby I had things figured out.  Hair done = happy mom.   ;)

Now – to really answer your question (sorry I’m so long winded today!)  

Scoop on San Diego.  Yes!  San Diego is ABSOLUTELY a place where people care about their looks and put on their A game.  Southern California — it is its own beast!  Exercise is huge here.  Driving down the street you will always see walkers/joggers/bikers.  If you go to an outdoor mall, a restaruant, or even just to pick up your kids at school, you will see beautiful women everywhere.  (Yes!  Even at Target!)  I love it because it motivates me to exercise and look my best, but it can also be hard because it’s easy to feel inadequate.  I sometimes worry about raising my girls in a city where, especially in certain areas, so much emphasis is placed on looks.  But that is true about our society in general regardless of where you live.  I try really hard to teach my girls how beautiful they are on the inside and what true beauty is all about.  In my opinion that is one of the most important things a mother can teach her daughter.  So no, it was not just your perception!  Women generally do try to look their best in my neck of the woods.  :)

Ok.  If you made it through that marathon of a post I salute you!  And I apologize if now you have no time to check in with other blogs.  If you have a question for me about hair (or anything else for that matter!) let me know.  And thanks again for all of your supportive, uplifting comments and e-mails.  I really wish I would have been blogging when I had Ellie.  It would have helped me so much to hear from other moms going through similar struggles.  You all help me now more than you know!
xoxo, Erin
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34 thoughts on “Let’s talk hair (#2 in the series!)

  1. I bought the Conair curling iron you mentioned in a previous post from Target and absolutely love it. It works better than my expensive version and really curls my hair fast. Thank you for sharing your hair tips. You have an adorable figure to go with your beautiful hair, any chance you might share what you do to keep your figure?

  2. what a great post! i can really relate- especially about southern california. living where i live in los angeles, and that my husband works in the entertainment business, it is overwhelming sometimes the emphasis on appearance. i really need to step up my game- i am so excited to see your next hair post! :-) i do not even own a curling iron- ha! but there are some products i can’t live without (like my laura mercier tinted moisturizer). i find when i put my makeup on (minimal as it may be)- i feel SO much better about myself. it is so hard to find the time, but SO important to find the time! :-)

  3. P.S. I organized a kitchen drawer tonight and thought of you! I used little plastic containers and everything- my first time! Ha! :-)

  4. Awesome post, I just had baby #2 and kind of fell into a rut myself. I learned too to take care of myself. I found that just a little eyeliner goes a long way! Thanks for sharing your story with us, I do believe that hearing from other mommies that are or have been through the same things help!

    I too, would love to know your exercise routine, and when you fit it in. I am still trying to learn this part, juggling 2 kids, work and exercise!

  5. hi erin!
    cute post. so true about putting yourself first a priority. i am a way better mom and in a way better mood when i excersice and do my hair!!!

    and ps- i always opt for the done hair and big sunglasses look when low on time. ;)

  6. I live in San Diego as well and I definately agree that there is an emphasis on beauty here over other places. I was raised on the East Coast and when we moved to S.D., we noticed the difference right away. However, I think if one’s children are raised knowing that God has made everyone beautiful in their own special and unique way, they will look at the world differently. You are teaching your children to dress modestly {which is a feat in itself} and you’re a great role model for them. They’ll be just fine:) Much love!

  7. I could talk hair all day too…in fact, I just did a hair post last week! I have thick hair too…and if there’s any humidity in the air, it gets curly. I too have found that if I do my hair, I feel better. My problem is that my hair is so thick and takes forever to blow out. I’ve been checking out short styles…just not quite ready to take the plunge! Your hair always looks great! (It must not be humid in San Diego!)

  8. Erin! I LOVE this post, I think it’s such great inspiration to Moms out there. Many of the Moms I know {young and old} fall into that ‘I don’t care about myself anymore, I have babies to take care of mentality} and I totally believe that when a women stops caring about the way she looks she stops caring about everything else. I have an 8 year old son, he’s my only one, but I have always vowed to myself and to my Husband that no matter what I do or where I go I always try to look my best, I don’t do this for anyone else, I do this for myself. When I’m not dressed cute or when my hair isn’t done I feel crappy, and just plain blah about myself and in turn I end up not being the happy Mom I hope to be for my son. I can promise when I have another child I will make a commitment to myself to lose all that baby weight and maintain my appearance. I’m sure a lot of women appreciated this post, and you are soo thoughtful for posting!

  9. Fun post! I just chopped my hair off last week and am still in that awkward dating phase — kind of giddy about the new look, but also not quite sure how to style it. You’d think since it’s shorter it would be easier to do, but I find when I go with a new cut, it is hard to get a new styling routine down.

    Anyways, my question. What kind of products do you use — shampoo, conditioner, etc.?

    I cleanout and organized my fridge this weekend and thought of you in the process. : ) I kept thinking how I wanted to take a picture it looked so good. Ha! It feels great and I am definitely going to keep it up. Love the tip of reorganizing and wiping down before loading it with new groceries! Happy Monday!

  10. Love this post, Erin! I’m thrilled that your hair posts have now become a series. For the past few weeks I’ve been curling my long, thick hair (you’re my inspiration!) but I haven’t been able to figure out the pieces around my face. How do I achieve “the look” without the hair covering my eyes and instead flowing back (and staying there!)? Do you use a lot of hairspray? My inclination is to just tuck it all behind my ears, which defeats the whole goal! Can’t wait to read/see more!!

  11. Still getting questions about your hair huh? I thought your hair post last year pretty well covered it, but good luck getting pics of you curling your hair! ;)

    This is a great post and I think a good reminder for all moms. Just cause we stay home doesn’t mean we should look like crap all the time! That has been one of my fears with each baby I’ve had, that I will turn into one of those “frazzled” moms who always have their hair in a pony tail and no make up on. And it’s baby #3 that’s made it hard for me! I HATE not having make up on! But keeping up with all 3 has made it SO hard! I even started washing my hair just every other day and it helps but there are still too many days that make up is not happening around here! aahh! Got to do something about that!

  12. Ok – this has nothing to do with hair – (but a fun post nonetheless! :)) – I want to know about the difficulties of parenthood, in your words. Such as all the phases kids go through – sleep regressions.. picky eating.. potty training.. tantrum throwing.. etc etc.
    I know, what a downer of a question!! But I think a lot of other mamas out there would appreciate hearing your takes on all these, and some positive perspective. Because I think you do have a great perspective on life, I think you would end up helping someone out with your words of wisdom! :) There’s always some mama dealing with SOMETHING, you know?

  13. Great post, Erin – and a great reminder to take care of ourselves everyday (whether it’s hair or running – my daily ‘must-do’!). As my mother likes to say, even the flight attendants have it right when they instruct the parents to put on the oxygen masks first. You can’t help your little ones if you can’t breath yourself! I know, bad analogy right?!

    PS – a little bird told me your family might be coming our way next May for the reunion? I would be great to catch up!

  14. Thanks for answering my question on your blog! Im glad to have input from someone who lives in the area. Im actually more curious about your makeup routine then hair. Do you wear a foundation? Powder? etc? You seem to have good skin, so Im guessing you probably can get away with just some cream blush, eyeliner etc, and lipstick. I like that you dont pile on the makeup.

  15. oooh!ahhh!!! You know I love a post about hair! Thanks for the inspiring words! Sometimes it feels like there isn’t even ten minutes to do my hair. I bought the Costco shampoo and conditioner on Friday b/c of you, and Rebecca’s hair is looking so great after using it! Thanks for the giving me a great tip on beauty at a great price!:)

  16. FYI: Im a hair stylist and many are asking what is a good shampoo and conditioner. Guess what guys, I usually use high end brands always, but I heard that pantene has a new shampoo and conditioner called beautiful lengths shine enhance. My hair loves it! Im so impressed! Everyone should give this one a try.

  17. I have naturally straight hair and my hair loved the San Diego weather when I was serving my mission there for a year and a half. I also loved the salons I went to as well.

    But my mom hated the humidity in San Diego when I took her back for a visit. Her hair gets very frizzy.

    Now I’m back in Utah and I have to contend with the dry air. I would love to live in San Diego again. It is so beautiful.

  18. Erin, do another blog post on hair if you want, its your blog. Ignore the comment about you already having done one on hair in the past. People change the technique, products etc…and maybe you just want to do an updated post about it.

  19. Alright Erin… you asked us to ask right??? It feels very personal to be asking questions about your hair but I’m going to go for it!!! I’ve been hoping and hoping you would talk about color. In some pictures of you and Kenny in “the early days” your hair looks a lot darker. I’m wondering if you use any color or highlights? Did you ever make a big color change or just subtle ones?

    My twins have beautiful red hair and I have all the freckles and coloring but didn’t get the pretty red hair… I’m trying to convine myself to go a bit more “ginger” :)

    Love your blog and your hair :)

  20. Hey, Erin!

    I am one of your “hair fans.” Love, love, love your hair. I have hair about the same length and opt for the standard ponytail most days… or, as my husband calls it – the “slooooochie ponytail.” He hates it! But my hair is so thick and really needs to be washed daily to look its best, which is a pain in the you-know-what. My biggest hang up is that I hate blowdrying. Hate is a strong word, I know. But that’s how I feel. I cannot stand blowdrying my hair, but it looks like crap if I don’t. Then I always need to either straighten or curl it for it to lay nicely. What is your hair routine? How often do you wash? What are your blowdrying techniques? Do you have a quick and easy curling method? What products do you use? Where are your kids while you are doing your hair? How long does your hair take to do most days? Do you wear your hair the same way every day? Do you have any easy hairdo ideas? I guess I just want to know everything! Can’t wait to see your post on this!

    And I totally agree with you that you have to take care of yourself. Even though I don’t do my hair every day, I enjoy getting dressed up for a date night with my hubby. It’s hard feeling good about yourself when you know you don’t look good.

    Take care!
    Shannon in PA

  21. I think you are so cute and I can’t imagine you in sweats and unfixed hair. But, thank you for sharing this with us, because I too went through this as well after having Kendall and it helps knowing that others go through it as well! I finally got myself in gear after our summer vacation and feel so much better about myself:)

    I have very frizzy, coarse, and dry hair. What doesn’t help my hair is the nasty Kentucky humidity! When my husband and I got married we went on a cruise that left out of Long Beach. My hair was so pretty in Long Beach and I give credit to the humidity that didn’t follow me there from Kentucky!!

    I love reading your post they always make me laugh out loud in some way!

    I also wanted to thank you for teaching us how to make our own blog headers! I made my fall/halloween header a few weeks ago and I think it gets easier and easier each time I make one so thank you!

  22. Hi there! Just wanted to spread the word about a great hair product I recently found. I use to use Enjoy Hair Straightener (I heard about it on your blog, I think) anyway, I loved Enjoy, but it was kind of expensive and I had to order it on Amazon. So while buying some Suave Sleek shampoo at the grocery store recently, I noticed they had a coupon for a free Suave styling product. I just grabbed some Suave Sleek Anti-Frizz Cream. Oh my goodness!! This stuff works so much better than Enjoy for me! It’s only around $2.59 too! Oh yeah…I live in the VERY humid southeast Texas, so believe me when I say this stuff can handle the humidity! (we’re talking like 100 degrees with 90% humidity) P.S. I also use the Suave Sleek shampoo and conditioner and love them too. Just thought I’d pass along a good deal.


  23. Your hair is beautiful and one of the best things about you!!! Along with many many more :) Dont ever ever ever cut it!!!!! Also, i cant wait to read more about styling products, curling irons etc!!!

  24. ERin.. i have to comment again!!! Please let us know when you are doind an in depth tutorial on how your curling iron works such such wonders around your face. I have used a curling so many times with results not even close to like yours. Also i have very THICK but frizzy hair!! SO styling products advice would b helpful.. i live in california too!! LA!

  25. @Josie, I don’t think her hair will ever be out of style as it is just beautiful curls!

    Plus, based on the number of comments, people want MORE hair posts!! Keep ’em coming. (

    Josie, maybe you’re just jealous–your pic looks like your hair is straight/opposite of Erin’s)

  26. OMG Im laughing at the above comment! I was thinking the SAME thing! Arent they friends??? This isnt the first time Ive noticed Josie leave some snarky comments. Im sensing a bit of jealously too. Glad Im not the only one who notices these things….lol

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